When I think back to when I was a kid, every time I saw a small animal get hurt, I would feel especially sad.
But I don't know when I realized that I had become numb to the pain of my parents, loved ones or friends. When they were hurt, sad, or experiencing setbacks, I felt no empathy in my heart, nor did I feel the urge to sympathize.
On the contrary, sometimes I even feel angry and annoyed that these situations are so bothersome and exhausting to me.
Then I would feel ashamed of myself for reacting that way and pretend to care about them.
But more often than not, I would hide my anger, annoyance and shame and walk away pretending not to care.
It's hard to say I'm faking it, because maybe deep down I really don't care.
My parents noticed my indifference as well, and they called me a white knight and said I had no conscience.
It bothers me a little.
Also, it's hard for me to be genuinely happy for my friends and family when they're happy or accomplishing something, I can barely smile at best, but this aspect of my life doesn't affect me much.
Do I have a mental problem?
In fact, each of us has two ways of expressing our emotions: one rational and one emotional.
The kind of inability to feel the emotions of others and the lack of empathy that you describe is a sign of a lack of sensual expression.
When we were young, we were all very emotional, we cried when we were sad, and laughed when we were happy, without reservation, as we pleased.
But as we grow up, we find it easy to be hurt by such blunt expressions, and adults' ridicule and accusations can be painful.
So, children begin to learn to protect themselves and wrap themselves up to avoid being hurt.
So I'm guessing you may have been criticized a lot in your childhood, or society expects men to be strong and powerful and not show weakness.
Having received this information, you may think that enduring with a grimace is what is strong, and that crying and weakness are shameful.
If you do think that, it means you're repressing a part of your emotions and hiding it deep inside.
It's as if you hide them behind your back, and when you look in the mirror you only see the shiny front, while the back hides all the things you don't want to face.
These emotions that are hidden away are indeed bad in certain situations, such as when weakness can make a person feel helpless.
But the truth is, there are times when even the strongest person is powerless, and there are many things we can't control.
For example, we can't control the weather, who we meet, or what happens in the future, much less live forever.
So being open to the uncontrollable takes learning, courage and wisdom.
Many people want to avoid people or things they don't like, but life is long and we can't avoid it completely.
So you gradually replace sensibility with reason and suppress it to the point where you can't feel it.
As a result, not only do you not feel the pain and pleasure of others, but you also lose your own emotional perception.
You become a reasonable, rational steel giant, using reason to protect yourself against uncomfortable emotions.
So others find you cold and unable to communicate emotionally, such as warmth, understanding and support.
They may not know how to express this and just feel you are becoming more and more distant and not feeling your warmth and support.
I don't know if this makes you angry or confused, but maybe you need to learn to feel your emotions again, whether they are pleasure or pain.
You can only feel others if you feel yourself first. You don't have a problem, you are just hiding part of yourself; find it and you will be able to perceive emotions again.
❤️ I'm Heart Explorations Coach Mulan Mulan and I hope my answer helps you.